For approximately 13 weeks of the year, school age children have breaks from their academic learning in the form of half terms, Christmas, Easter and summer holidays. Such a sizeable amount of time for any parent can be challenging with them having to juggle work, childcare and a shortage of annual leave entitlement that matches that of school children.
Such time can be especially overwhelming if you are a separated parent who then needs to plan how the holidays are to be shared. This can often be a difficult hurdle to cross, especially if there is a difference in opinion on how, when and where contact should take place.
Work together and plan ahead
To try to avoid any conflict, it is always best to start discussions as soon as you can in order to plan ahead. This may be in the form of obtaining your child`s term dates for the current and future academic year so that you can then propose dates, holidays and how handovers would work.
Communicate and provide information
If you are planning on going abroad, information should be given to the parent not attending the holiday such as flight and accommodation details and there should be a handover of the child’s passport ideally a couple of weeks ahead of the departure.
It is of note that those who hold parental responsibility for the child will all need to agree to the child going on holiday. Married parents share parental responsibility, unmarried parents may or may not both hold parental responsibility; but in either case written agreement to the holiday will be required by the non-attending parent who holds parental responsibility.
Ask your children what they want
If your child or children are old enough, ask them what they want to do and how they want to split their holidays between you and your former partner/spouse. Make sure that you don’t project your feelings on to your children or encourage them to say what you want to hear.
Seek advice
If an agreement cannot be reached, it is important to be pro-active in trying to obtain agreement firstly through attending mediation. This involves an independent, impartial and professionally trained mediator working with you and your former partner/spouse to try and find a solution that works for both of you and is sometimes a requirement before seeking a court order.
If mediation is not fruitful, then you may be able to issue an application at Court such as a Specific Issue Order, which gives a parent permission to take a child on holiday or go to another country where your ex (and the parent who has parental responsibility for the child) does not agree to the trip.
At Rothera Bray Solicitors, we understand that families face having these difficult discussions and that there are many complexities involved in trying to find a solution that works for all concerned. Our aim is to try to help you reach an amicable solution by providing you with clear, pragmatic advice. You will then be in a position to make informed decisions and you will know what your options are in how you can potentially move matters forward.
If you find yourself facing such challenges, please contact the highly experienced Family team at Rothera Bray on 03456 465 465 or email enquiries@rotherabray.co.uk
Helpful links
Family Mediation Council : Home – Family Mediation Council
Gingerbread: help for single parents 0808 802 0925 Home | Gingerbread
NSPCC: Helping Your Child Cope with Your Divorce or Separation | NSPCC
Families Need Fathers: helpline 0300 0300 363 Families Need Fathers – Home (fnf.org.uk)
